"HAPPY COUPLE + BAD HABITS = DISASTER!!!"

(WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BAD HABITS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE??)

Sometimes being in love means making sacrifices doesn't mean you hav to put up with your partner.(There's a big differece between giving up the last cookie and letting your other half get away with shoplifting) Bad habits can range from disgusting to downright illegal and end up ruining even the most perfect partnership.

So if happily ever after is what you want, try these steps to ensure a smooth sailing relationship.

STEP 1 : Confront Your Partner.

Ask your partner why he or she practises the bad habit and how it makes them feel. A lot of times, people do things because it makes them feel accepted by their friends, comforted when they have done it for so long that it has become acceptable to them. Most people, when confronted with a situation like this, will be in denial and will not willingly admit that what they are doing has become a problem. By getting them to answer these questions, you'll be helping them to come to terms with the fact that they do have a problem and what are the deep-rooted reasons for them wanting to do those things in the first place.


STEP 2 : Getting To The Root Of The Problem.

Open communications is the key to any successful relationships. Being open and honest with your significant other will help create trust in the relationship. Once you trust each other, it will be easier for you to tell him or her how you really feel about his or her bad habit. Sit down with your partner and tell them that you feel uncomfortable with what he or she is doing. Put across what exactly about the bad habit you feel uncomfortable with gently. Is it because you feel embarassed when they do it in public? Or is it because the bad habit is a threat to their health? Be prepared that your partner will probably get abgry or become extremely emotional. The most important thing at this stage is to stay calm, even if you feel otherwise.


STEP 3 : Be Supportive.

Lastly, ask if your partner is willing to break this bad habit and tell them that you will be there to give support if they are willing to change for the better. Assuming that your partner cannot totally give up their bad habit, try and reach a compromise and suggest that they try to reduce the number of times they practice the habit. You could suggest that they start a journal, if they havn't already, and record their feelings whenever they feel like doing the bad habit.


This are some suggestions for us to try out. When you are always the one giving into a relationship, there will be bound to be a day where you can't take it anymore. When that day arises....The consequences after your eruption will be drastic.At that time there is no turning back.

" I can't take REJECTION!!!! "

I you can't stomach failure, you're not alone. "I don't know too many people who are happy when they get rejected," shares John P. Streklecky, author of the international bestseller THEY WHY ARE YOU HERE CAFE : A NEW WAY OF FINDING MEANING IN YOUR LIFE AND YOUR WORK. "And yet, i think there can be some benefits to it." If there's anyone who knows how to turn life's bitter limes into a swell margarita,it's Strelecky,who is no stranger to rejection. Over 20 American publishers turned down the manuscript for his book before it was picked up about a year ago. Today, THE WHY ARE YOU HERE CAFE is available in 14 languages and sold all over the world. With Strelecky's advice, you can turn your fiascoz into fuel for future success.


Think "Its not about me....or him"
"Exhibiting a blaming behaviour is one of the worst things we can do," says Strlecky,who has more proactive attitude. "If things aren't a good fit.There is no point in wasting your time and energy blaming others or yourself." Avid writer nd makeup enthuasiast Marie,29, felt crestfallen when she didn't land a job with a big cosmetics company. But three months later, she was interviewed for the coveted position of beauty editor for a glossy magazine - and snagged the job. "Now i write about what i love and get to try favourite beauty brands for free," she gushes.

Make rejection your mentor.
Failure can be a very valuable teacher. Say you interviewed for a job, only to learn the position went to someone else. What do you do?? Strlecky suggests taking time to talk toyour interviewer about why you didn't get it. "There is a chance you'll uncover something whcih you can use in your next interview, so that you get the next job," he explains. In some cases, asking for insight may help turn things around in y our favour even after you've been rejected. "If you ask an interviewer for feedback and he/she says he was looking for more examples of leadership skills, you can immediately say,"i'm sorry i didn't cover that more when we spoke earlier.Here are three situations where i've demonstrated excellent leadership."

Change your perspective.
See your glass as half-full, not half-empty. "Thomas Edison was trying to find filament for light bulbs, and after trying 10,000 things that didn't work,his comment was that he hadn't failed 10,000 times - he had discovered 10,000 things that didn't work," shares Strelecky. Edison learned from each rejection, made some changes, then tried again. "Luckily for all of us, he stayed with it and eventually figured it out."

Let it boost your confidence.
believe it or not, getting the door slammed in your face can be self-esteem booster. "Look at the person who is rejecting you and realise he or she is not as talented as you are," says Strlecky. When an interviewer snubbed Amy's impressive nine-year background in marketing, and turned her down for asking a salary that was way beyond the budget, Amy walked away knowing what she was worth. A day later, another manager within the same company got holf of her CV, recognised her genius, and offered her a much better job and salary."We have to be our own biggest fans," says Strelecky. "If we take rejection personally, our faith in our abilities goes down."

Keep trying until you hear a "YES".
"Sometimes, I think rejections are simply the universe's way of testing us to see how much we really want something,"No is almost never the answer; it just means we have to ask someone else, or ask in a different way." Despite a string of heartaches, Jaclyn never gave up on love and marriage. "My last two fiances both cheated on me, and that made me a love cynic for awhile," recounts the 32yr old jeweller. But a chance encounter with a shy Frenchman during a beach holiday inspired her to give love another chance."I told myself,'This could work out or it could fail.'But i chose to try anyway." Two years later, the two were married in an intimate ceremony in the French countryside of Provence.

Remember, nobody is immune to rejection - even successful people. "the difference is that rejection is temporary for successful people," says Strelecky. "They experience it, they learn from it, and then they overcome it." Just like them, you can too.

Make your LOVE LAST The Distance !!

Couples who embark on long-distance relationships do so because they are convinced their love is far too special to just let fade away. But,deciding to stay together when you're going to be oceans apart from each other is as much a leap of faith as it is a leap in the dark. Along-distance relationship is hard work, and keeping those feelings intact requires a great deal of effort in the form of commitment and patience. Communication, too, is key, whether you are 1000 or 10 000 miles from each other. It is important to continue to share your thoughts and emotions as you did when you were physically together, to help strengthen the bonds that have held your relationship together all the while. Here, five special ways to show your guy/girl that, despite the distance, he/she is still your NUMBER ONE!

FAITHFULLY YOURS....
Surprise your honey with a hand-written love letter revealing your innermost feelings. It doesn't matter if you don't consider yourself a good write; let love guide you and just let the words flow. Need inspiration?? Check out Passionate Love Letters; An Anthology Of Desire by Michelle Lovric. Letter writting is a lost art, which is why your guy/girl is bound to appreciate the effort you made putting pen to paper. be sure to use nice stationery, and spritz your letter with your favourite perfume before sealing the envelope.

LUST LINES....
Fire up those sexy memories with a naugthy phone conversation (use your best sex-kitten voice). You can start by saying you miss his/her touch and kisses, and that you can't wait to feel his/her arms around you/make out with him or her/ (insert your sexy desire here). Take it further by exchanging sexy fantasies over the phone. Sharing such sweet intimacies verbally can help reinforce the attraction you feel towards each other.

BLOG IT....
Start a web log for your honey's eyes only. A blog is a great tool for him to keep up-to-speed with what's going on in your world. You can even share photos this way (but not of the racy sort as people can randomly find your blog even if you've kept the address private). A blog is an online journal, so keep the tone of your writting like that of a personal iary entry. Make sure he posts comments!

PICTURE THIS....
Make him a scrapbook of risque photos, complete with steamy captions. You don't have to reveal all in order to get the sexy message across : even photos of you in a lovely lingerie and heels will be enough to get his pulse racing. (Warning! If you're afraid your pics will show up on the 'Net ahould your relationship sour, don't put yourself at risk in the first place).Pictures taken together which will trigger alot of lovely memories are well recommended.


GIFT OF LOVE....
Send him/her a box of his/her favourite snacks, magazines, toiletries, and anything else you think he/she might need. He/She'll be touched by the fact that you actually remember what he/she likes, and happier still because it probably isn't everyday he/she gets nice surprises in the mail. Include a heartfelt note with the package, letting him/her know you're thinking about him/her and that the contents were specially handpicked by YOU!