Men's Rules...

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

2. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

3. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

4. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

5. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

6. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

7. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

8. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

9. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

10. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!!